Brian

Top marks for not trying

So kind of you to bless us with your effortlessness

We're grateful, so strangely comforted

And I wonder, are you putting us under

'Cause we can't take our eyes off the t-shirt and ties combination?

Well, see you later, innovator

Some want to kiss, some want to kick you

There's not a net you couldn't slip through

Or at least that's the impression I get

'Cause you're smooth, and you're wet

And she's not aware yet, but she's yours

She'll be saying, "Use me, show me the jacuzzi"

I imagine that it's there on a plate

Your high rendezvous rate

Means that you'll never be frightened to make 'em wait for a while

I doubt it's your style not to get what you set

Out to acquire, the eyes are on fire

You are the unforecasted storm, oh

(Brian) calm, collected and commanding

(Top marks for not trying) you leave the other stories standing

With your renditions and jokes, bet there's hundreds of blokes

That have wept 'cause you've stolen their

Thunder

Are you putting us under

'Cause we can't take our eyes off the t-shirt and ties combination?

Well, see you later, innovator

🎵

He knew what he wanted to say

But he didn't know how to word it

The dirty little Herbert was seeking an escape

But the place was well-guarded

The guiltiness that started

Soon as the other part had stopped

D is for delightful

And try and keep your trousers on

I think you should know

You're his favourite worst nightmare

D is for desperately tryin' to stimulate

What it was that was alright, three quarters of an hour ago

That had led him to be in a position and every compromission

And every other episode

He's nearin' the brink, but he thinks first

The parallel universe perhaps could be the perfect scene

He's nearin' the brink, but he thinks first

The parallel universe perhaps could be the perfect scene

He's nearin' the brink, but he thinks first

The parallel universe perhaps could be the perfect scene

He's nearin' the brink, but he thinks first

The parallel-

I think you should know you're his favourite worst nightmare

D is for delightful

And try and keep your trousers on

You should know

You're his favourite worst nightmare

🎵

Running off over next door's garden before the hour is done

It's more a question of feeling than it is a question of fun

The confidence is the balaclava, I'm sure you'll baffle 'em good

Will the ending reek of salty cheeks and runny makeup alone?

Or will blood run down the face of a boy bewildered and scorned?

And you'll find yourself in a skirmish where you wish you'd never been born

You tie yourself to the tracks, and there isn't no going back

And it's wrong, wrong, wrong, but we'll do it anyway 'cause we love a bit of trouble

Are you pulling her from a burning building or throwing her to the sharks?

Can only hope that the ending is as pleasurable as the start

The confidence is the balaclava, I'm sure you'll baffle 'em straight

And it's wrong, wrong, wrong, but she can hardly wait

That's right, he won't let her out his sight

Now the shaggers perform, and the daggers are drawn

Who's the crooks in this crime?

That's right, he won't let her out his sight

Now the shaggers perform, and the daggers are drawn

Who's the crooks in this crime?

That's right, he won't let her out his sight

That's right, he won't let her out his sight

That's right, he won't let her out his sight

Will you be able to boast of the day of the most flawless heist of all time?

You knew that it'd be trouble right before the very first kiss

Quiet and unassuming, but you heard that they were the naughtiest

She pleaded with you to take it off, but you resisted and fought

But sorry, sweetheart, I'd much rather keep on the balaclava

🎵

You used to get it in your fishnets

Now you only get it in your nightdress

Discarded all the naughty nights for niceness

Landed in a very common crisis

Everything's in order in a black hole

Nothing seems as pretty as the past, though

That Bloody Mary's lacking in Tabasco

Remember when you used to be a rascal?

Oh, the boy's a slag, the best you ever had

The best you ever had is just a memory

And those dreams weren't as daft as they seem

As daft as they seem, my love, when you dream them up

Flicking through a little book of sex tips

Remember when the boys were all electric?

Now when she's told she's gonna get it

I'm guessing that she'd rather just forget it

Clinging to not getting sentimental

Said she wasn't going, but she went still

Likes her gentlemen not to be gentle

Was it a Mecca Dauber or a betting pencil?

Oh, the boy's a slag, the best you ever had

The best you ever had is just a memory

And those dreams weren't as daft as they seem

As daft as they seem, my love, when you dream them up

Oh, Flo

Where did you go?

Where did you go?

Where did you go? Oh

You're falling about

You took a left off Last Laugh Lane

Just sounding it out

But you're not coming back again

You're falling about

You took a left off Last Laugh Lane

You were just sounding it out

But you're not coming back again

You used to get it in your fishnets (falling about)

Now you only get it in your nightdress

Discarded all the naughty nights for niceness (you took a left off Last Laugh Lane)

Landed in a very common crisis

Everything's in order in a black hole (you were just sounding it out)

Is anything as pretty in the past, though?

That Bloody Mary's lacking in Tabasco (you're not coming back again)

Remember when you used to be a rascal? Oh

🎵

In a foreign place, the saving grace was the feeling

That it was a heart that he was stealing

Oh, he was ready to impress and the fierce excitement

The eyes are bright, he couldn't wait to get away

And I bet that Juliet was just the icing on the cake

Make no mistake, no

And even if somehow we could have

Shown you the place you wanted

Well, I'm sure you could have

Made it that bit better on your own

And I bet she told a million people that she'd stay in touch

Well, all the little promises, they don't mean much

When there's memories to be made

And I hope you're holding hands by New Year's Eve

They made it far too easy to believe

That true romance can't be achieved these days

And even if somehow we could have

Shown you the place you wanted

Well, I'm sure you could have

Made it that bit better on your own

You are the only ones who know

🎵

Well, the mourning was complete

When there was tears on the steering wheel dripping on the seat

Several hours or several weeks

I'd have the cheek to say they're equally as bleak

It's the beginning of the end

The car went up the hill and disappeared around the bend

Ask anyone, they'll tell you that it's these times that it tends

To start to break in half, to start to fall apart, hold on to your heart

And do me a favour and break my nose

Or do me a favour and tell me to go away

Or do me a favour and stop asking questions

She walked away while her shoes were untied

And the eyes were all red, you could see that we'd cried

And I watched and I waited 'til she was inside

Forcing a smile and waving goodbye

Curiosity becomes a heavy load

Too heavy to hold, too heavy to hold

Curiosity becomes a heavy load

Too heavy to hold, will force you to be cold

Do me a favour and ask if you need some help

She said, "Do me a favour and stop flattering yourself"

And to tear apart the ties that bind

Perhaps "Fuck off" might be too kind

Perhaps "Fuck off" might be too kind

🎵

This house is a circus, berserk as fuck

We tend to see that as a perk

Though, look what it's done to your friends

Their memories are pretend

And the last thing that they want is for the feeling to end

This house is a circus, berserk as fuck

We tend to see that as a perk

Though, look what it's done to your friends

Their memories are pretend

And the last thing that they want is for the feeling to end

There's a room for the trouble and there's lovers to be had

Those walls will make sinners out of such lovely lads

Scaling the corridors for maidens in the maze

And in the anomaly, you'll slip into familiar ways

And we're

Forever unfulfilled

And can't think why

Like a search for murder clues

In dead men's eyes

Forever unfulfilled

And can't think why

Like a search for murder clues

In dead men's eyes

The more you open your mouth, the more you're forcing performance

And all the attention is leading me to feel important

(Give me obnoxious, give me obnoxious now)

Now that we're here, we may as well go too far

Wringling around in incidents you won't forget

There's certainly some venom in the looks that you collect

Aimlessly gazing at the faces in the queue

And we're struggling with the notion that it's life, not film

This house is a circus, berserk as fuck (we're forever unfulfilled)

We tend to see that as a perk (and can't think why)

Though, look what it's done to your friends

Their memories are pretend (like a search for murder clues)

And the last thing that they want is for the feeling to end

🎵

If you were there, beware the serpent soul pinchers

Three-hundred and fifty, "no, thank yous" and nobody flinches

Go on, girl, go on, give us something gruesome

We require your grief, the thugs help the thieves

As they're trying to rob the words from her gob and

Take the source of the innocence

If you were there, beware the serpent soul pinchers

Can't you sense she was never meant to fill column inches

Ain't you had enough? What you're trying to dig up

Isn't there to be dug, the thieves help the thugs

As they're trying to beat the good grace of a sweetheart

Out to the point she'll comply

And why leave her on her own?

If I'd have known then I wouldn't have said it

I wouldn't have said it if I would have known

Why leave her on her own?

If I predicted tears then I wouldn't have said it

I wouldn't have said it if I would have known

There's a circle of witches, ambitiously vicious they are

And our attempts to remind them of reason won't get us that far

But I don't know what it is that they want

I don't know what it is that they want

But I haven't got it to give

And she hasn't got it to give

🎵

Do the bad thing

Take off your wedding ring

But it won't make it that much easier

It might make it worse

Oh, the night's like a whirlwind

Somebody's girlfriend's talking to me, but it's alright

She's saying that he's not gonna slap me or try to attack me

He's not the jealous type

And I only need to get half an excuse, and I'm away

But when there's no excuses, that's much easier to say

I've been before

And all these capers make us too good for her to ignore

See, she's talking, but I'm not entirely sure

Do the bad thing

Take off your wedding ring

But it won't make it that much easier

It might make it worse

Oh, a sudden disheartener

Somebody's partner's talking to me

But I don't know that is what she isn't

She murmurs things to confirm that the tragedy is true

And I knew, how could she not? She could have anyone she wants

And I'm struggling to think of an immediate response

Like, "I don't mind, it'd be a big mistake for you to wait

And let me waste your time

Really, love, it's fine"

I said really, love, it's fine

And then the first time it occurred that there was something to destroy

I knew before the invitation that there was this ploy

Oh, but she carried on suggesting, a struggle to refuse

She said, "It's the red wine this time", but that is no excuse

🎵

Old yellow bricks, love's a risk

Quite the little escapologist

Looked so miffed when you wished

For a thousand places better than this

You are the fugitive, but you don't know what you're runnin' from

You can't kid us, and you couldn't trick anyone

Houdini, love, you don't know what you're runnin' away from

Who wants to sleep in a city that never wakes up? Blinded by nostalgia

Who wants to sleep in a city that never wakes up?

She was enraged by the way

That the emperor put traps in the cage

And the days she deemed dull

Lead to nights readin' beer bottles

You're such a fugitive, but you don't know what you're runnin' from

You can't kid us, and you couldn't trick anyone

Houdini, love, you don't know what you're runnin' away from

Who wants to sleep in a city that never wakes up? Blinded by nostalgia

Who wants to sleep in a city that never wakes up?

You're at a loss, just because

It wasn't all that you thought it was

You are a fugitive, but you don't know what you're runnin' away from

She said, "I want to sleep in a city that never wakes up and revel in nostalgia"

I know, I said, "Who wants to sleep in a city that never wakes up?"

But Dorothy was right though

🎵

I'm going back to 505

If it's a seven-hour flight or a 45-minute drive

In my imagination, you're waiting lying on your side

With your hands between your thighs

Stop and wait a sec

Oh, when you look at me like that, my darling, what did you expect?

I'd probably still adore you with your hands around my neck

Or I did last time I checked

Not shy of a spark

The knife twists at the thought that I should fall short of the mark

Frightened by the bite, though it's no harsher than the bark

The middle of adventure is such a perfect place to start

I'm going back to 505

If it's a seven-hour flight or a 45-minute drive

In my imagination, you're waiting lying on your side

With your hands between your thighs

But I crumble completely when you cry

It seems like once again you've had to greet me with goodbye

I'm always just about to go and spoil a surprise

Take my hands off of your eyes too soon

I'm going back to 505

If it's a seven-hour flight or a 45-minute drive

In my imagination, you're waiting lying on your side

With your hands between your thighs and a smile

🎵